Yu-Gi-Oh! The Abridged Series

Yugi's puzzle is stolen when the very force of evil itself tries to take over the world.

Kaiba receives a phone call from someone claiming to be Deep Throat... oh wait, that's All The President's Men. Kaiba gets a call from Ishizu Ishtar, promising to inform him of the show's plot. Cue lots an lots of expository dialogue. Can we make this funny? Only one way to found out...

Tea and Yami go on a date, with typically disastrous consequences. Ever see the movie 50 First Dates? Neither have we. But we imagine this episode is a lot like that movie. Except with just the one date. And no Adam Sandler. But that's a sacrifice we're willing to make.

As Yami learns of his origins as an Ancient Egyptian Pharaoh, Kaiba undertakes a potentially deadly videogame tutorial with the promise of confectionary delights as his only reward. Friendships are tested, blood is spilled, and cards are set in face-up position. Here we go again.

Joey's estranged sister, Serenity, is finally going to have her eye operation. Unbeknownst to her, however, Joey has spent the money for the operation on children's trading cards.

The Battle City Tournament starts off with a bang as Yugi goes head to head with a rather forgettable henchman, Joey feels the ANIMOSITY, and Mokuba starts down the treacherous journey into kidulthood. Also, John Zhang.

While Tristan attempts to get to first base with Serenity, Joey duels an extremely loud character named Espa Roba whose entire family both look and sound exactly like him for no adequately explored reason. Apparently psychic powers are a byproduct of inbreeding.

Yami is missing! It's up to you, taking on the role of his brother Luigi, to find him! Travel to four thrilling locations and solve tedious trivia questions to help rescue him from the evil clutches of Bowser! Purchase this thrilling time-waster today! Entertainment not included. Dinsdale...?

Joey encounters an Underling-esque weeaboo, except without the mad photoshop skillz. Meanwhile, Marik takes up bird-watching, and Grandpa becomes a stuck record.

Card games: The final frontier. These are the voyages of the Starship Kuriboh. Its five year mission: To abridge strange and confusing duels. To seek out new gags and pop culture references. To boldly go where no limey has gone before. In this episode, Yami seduces another green-skinned alien chick. Or maybe he just duels a mime. It's hard to say.