Spooner's Patch

Daily mundanities and a vanload of drunken Scotsmen conspire to keep Spooner from watching a key football match.

Taking a thrashing from Bulsover during a self-defence lesson that he foolishly instigated, Spooner starts fiddling with a pair of hand cuffs...

Bulsover finds a locked briefcase whilst cleaning out a squad car. They find out it's full of jewellery, but who does it belong to?

Spooner is seduced by the bright lights of showbiz when a producer asks for his help in the making of a new film.

Spooner meets his match when a young boy turns up at the police station on his mother's orders.

Mrs. Cantaford tries to curtail Spooner's despotic activities by running for councillor on a "get rid of filth" ticket.

Extreme bordedom drives everyone to distraction and forces Spooner to fear for Bulsover's sanity.